What makes a doctor special?

PART ONE
Well, we are getting adjusted to the new routine - which is mainly less appointments! Callum still has issues with leg pain, but we have tried some new things and it seems to be a bit better.  He still gets sleepy now and then, but the med he has started using for pain is a steroid and helps with his appetite. It also usually helps him have a bit more energy. However, he doesn't get out often, and does have limited stamina to be out for too long.  He had a few good days this week, with only a few bouts of nausea. Overall he is doing pretty good. We will be going to watch Stu kickbox Sat night - we hope to be the lucky charms and see him win!

We have been able to enjoy being with family and friends - we are so lucky to have so many people care about and support us.!  Here are some recent pictures:

As you can see, Cade gives us a laugh every now and then!

After some support from a psychiatrist, I finally received approval for short term disability from end January to May 20. They will assess for long term disability based on my next appointment with the psychiatrist. It is nice to not have to worry about that for now!

PART TWO
We would never be where we are without the help of some world class doctors.  Yes, Callum has been very determined and positive - and that has made an incredible difference!  But we need to credit the doctors who have helped along the way. I can't say enough good things about the oncologist we have had for the last 1 1/2 years. He was compassionate, honest, patient (even with me!), complimentary, has a sense of humour, extremely knowledgeable, and able to calm me down (no easy feat!).  I will deeply miss the visits with him, and the regular support he has given both of us. He has offered to answer any questions or be of help if needed, but we no longer can look forward to regular visits. Perhaps I am going into withdrawal!!  Next week would have been our regular visit week....but not to be. I am not sure I know why I feel such a strong connection to him, but I think I know.  He had taken over Callum's file in Dec 2009 and we had only one visit with him before Callum was hospitalized with sepsis.  Our second meeting was our first emotional meeting - "he is very sick and will be here a few days" followed by "do you know if he wants help with breathing" and "as long as its reversible, right?".  What a conversation to have with someone you hardly know. I literally put Callum's life in his hands. Maybe that is it it, he helped give Callum at least 15 more months since then.  He was so respectful with me and helped me understand the honest, (and scary) facts, our choices, and supported and respected my decision.  He answered all my questions, and politely would tell me when I asked something he couldn't answer. And that is how it has been for over a year. We could go to our appointments, and I could be worried, angry, sad - it didn't matter - and he always, and I mean always, would tell us what he honestly thought, what the plan would be, and I always left feeling so much better. Well, except for our very last appointment. It was hard to leave that appt feeling good - but it wasn't his fault.  In fact, he was very human, and nearly apologetic that he couldn't do more for Callum.  Yes, I will miss him.  Very much.

The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention... A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words. Rachel Naomi Remen
TTFN

What Cancer Cannot Do

At the doctor's visit last week we found out the cancer in Callum's lungs has grown. There is a small spot on the liver that is suspected to be cancer, but not confirmed. What this means is that he will no longer have treatment. There are no further drugs to try and no clinical trials for which he is eligible.

We are doing OK - pretty much, anyway.  The doctor would not give any prognosis or estimate life expectancy at this point. He only said that with not having the side effects from chemo, and with the cancer currently growing fairly slow that he might be able enjoy spring and summer.

I am not quite ready to write much more than this right now - but I do have a video to share. I hope you like it.  Feel free to share the video if you like - it is also on YouTube and my Facebook page.

TTFN

Still Waiting

We have a couple of special important days coming up. 


Important Day #1

On April 5 we see the oncologist for the results of the CT scan. I tried to get them over the phone but was told the Dr. won't release them over the phone. That is the first time we haven't been given results by phone so we are expecting that it won't be great news. We can continue to be hopeful and optimistic, but must also be realistic.  I will update the blog later this week once we have the news.

Now would be a great time for a huge flood of positive thoughts!!!

Important day #2

On April 4 I move from one decade to the next.  The big "50"!  I can remember when only old people turned 50 - how did we all become so young at 50?  It has been quite the fun times over the past 50 years.  There have certainly been some very sad times, some troublesome times, and some anxious moments. But we have always tried to keep some fun in there somewhere. I think I am almost old enough now to know that I really "don't know it all", and likely never will. 


I have the learned the power of love and hope. And I have learned that the power of love comes in all ways - and sometimes most of all through the pain of having to renew it again. But love will win in the end. 


I have learned (and really try hard to practice!) to not judge anyone - even if you have walked a mile in their shoes. 


I have learned that giving people a hand up can sometimes help more than a hand out. That most people want to be successful but sometimes just lack the tools and knowledge to get there. And sometimes people are extremely happy with their lives, even though we might not be if it were us - and that is OK.


I have learned that most parents want to be good parents - they just don't know how. It is pure joy to see a mom try something new with baby and see it work. Smiles on both mom and babe light up a room!


Everyone has strengths - look for them, nurture them, grow them - in you, and in others.


I have learned the importance of being honest, doing a good job, and working hard. Compassion and understanding go a long way.


I have learned that it is important to find out who you are, what are your values, and then matching these to all your activities - work, volunteer, hobbies, friendships.


When you have lost your strength - don't be afraid to ask for help, from family, friends, medical professionals, and from whatever you use for faith.


I am still learning the power of patience - and that learning is a life long process. Enjoy it!


I have learned that what you have now won't last forever.  Not the couch, the computer, the flowers, your clothes. And that special people in your life leave this world far too early.

I have learned how quickly things can change in a minute. I have learned the positive side of being stubborn, determined, persistent, and perhaps, even obstinate. 

I have learned that no matter what are your troubles, everyone has troubles. They are not to be measured against each other - the biggest challenge in someone's life is still their biggest challenge. Honour it.

I have learned that being kind, even to the nastiest person, is still better than being nasty. I don't believe anyone really feels better when they act nasty.

I have learned that family can move about and be miles away from each other, but are always there when you need them. 

I have learned that if  you keep your eyes and ears open you will find opportunities you never thought existed. Sometimes you need to close you mouth so you can see and hear them. 

I have learned that yes, you can love someone even more tomorrow. And that you can pack in 50-60 years of loving in 30 years. 

My 50th birthday wish is that you take time to tell those special people you love them and miss them.  Pick up the phone or email a friend or family who you have not spoken with for a while. Take time for yourself. Cherish and be grateful for all the wonderful, beautiful things you have in your life. 

"Dream as if you’ll live forever. 
Live as though you’ll die tomorrow"~ James Dean

TTFN