Update time!

Cal BBQ-ing in Ixtapa .....fond memories of +30 degrees.....to take away the pain of -48 windchill!

Hi folks,

It has been a while since I have posted. Time seems to fly so fast these days. Callum has been doing OK - is starting to get some relief from the sciatica that started in February. Thank goodness for good massage therapists and chiropractors! He had another cycle of chemo this past week, with reduced 5 FU - one of the chemo drugs.  His platelets were up slightly so that is good. They had been a bit low the last cycle. We had some great news - the MRI of the lumbar spine region came back clear. It looks like the leg pain is caused by a regular, but painful, case of sciatica. He has his next CT scan on the abdomen/chest/pelvis on April 3.  Hopefully there are no changes again. He feels no different so we are feeling pretty positive!

I have gone back to work full time - we'll see how it goes. This is the busy time for us so I hope to be able to get us through the next 2 - 3 months. It helps so much now that Callum is able to drive again. We are having fun practicing the schedule and planning of who needs to be where and when and who will keep the car. Never a dull moment here! And with the reduced chemo he has fewer side effects so he is up to cooking and laundry a lot more often - it makes such a huge difference when he can do those things.  

We have a busy visiting week coming up. My friend and her daughter from Ohio are here for a few days.  They are here to see family so it will be busy for them. Cal's brother and wife (and hopefully nephew!) will be here this coming weekend, and our dear friends from Winnipeg will be here next Sunday (Carvers...here we come!). We have had a pretty quiet time the last couple of weeks so it will be nice to have visitors again. 

One thing that I have wondered about lately is what people think when we say Callum is doing well. I don't usually worry about what people think - mostly am wondering about the "science' of perception and communication. Sometimes I wonder if people think that he is feeling like he did a year ago - full of energy and able to take on anything. I wish that was the case. I have to remind myself sometimes that even though he looks like the same old guy (well, with a little less hair) he doesn't have that same energy level. It's just that he looks like he should be able to put on his suit and head to the office! And he does have a number of days he feels like that - just not enough of them. And he likely couldn't put in a full day. Just hard to see it that way, sometimes. And then....when I say he is doing OK....do people expect to see the gaunt looking cancer patient? And then wonder how sick he could be when they see him? Maybe I am just trying to reconcile it for myself so try to see it though the eyes of others.  It is just so hard to realize that even this time may be limited. Things have been pretty stable the last few weeks - it seems like we could live like this for years now! Hopefully that is the case. The other option just seems to be far away right now.

And we have so much to look forward to. Just over 3 months to being grandparents. You should see Callum's face light up every time we talk about the grandbaby. Such a wonderful time in the lives of Vanessa and Stuart...and ours! 

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude."     Denis Waitley

Merry go round or rollercoaster?

Another 2 weeks have gone by - where does the time go? Soon it will be spring - wont' it? 

We have had a busy couple of weeks. I am not sure if we are dizzy from being on a merry-go-round or from being on the mini rollercoaster.  Things are pretty much OK - not much to worry about.

Just over a week ago Callum hurt his back and had pain radiating down the back of his leg. We are thinking that it had something to do with the cook a thon he had preparing some food for our freezer. We spent some time at the hospital to make sure the pain wasn't from a blood clot. He had an ultrasound done on his leg which showed no clot - so we are very thankful! However, he continued to have a lot of pain and little sleep for the next few days - not a great combination for our visit to Medicine Hat.  Well, I managed to take a load of baby clothes there at least! Callum had a massage while we were in the Hat, and then had a couple of chiropractic adjustments and another massage which have helped so much. The chiropractor ordered an x-ray of the back (it appears to have been sciatica) to make sure there was no tumour causing the problem. The x-ray is clear so things seems to be OK. The oncologist ordered an MRI (March 4th) to make sure all is well. His back is starting to get tight again so he has another adjustment and massage on Wednesday. 

We had a visit with the oncologist last Tuesday. Things are pretty good. The liver enzymes have risen again which the Dr says could be either from the chemo or possibly the cancer has spread.  Callum will likely have a CT scan sometime this month to see if anything has changed in the chest, pelvis or abodomen since December. The 5FU chemo has been reduced again, per protocol, so is now 1/2 the original dose. 

We had a good call from Dr. Ahmad today. He has talked with Dr West, the gamma knife surgeon from Winnipeg. He says Dr West isn't concerned about the small change in one of the brain tumours - he feels they have responded to the gamma knife surgery.  We are quite happy to hear that!

We had a great visit with Callum's brother Alan and our niece Alex last week. We were busy with many appointments but did manage some good visits. I do think Callum enjoys having testosterone in the house whenever possible. 

Callum is handling the chemo quite well. Only a couple of days of fatique and a bit of nausea - quite different than before Christmas. 

With Callum doing better  - and being able to drive again - I am spending more time at work. It is coming up to our busy time so hopefully all works out for a while now.

These past few weeks have once again shown me how quickly things can change - for the worse - and for the better.  I have come up with a new response when looking into the future - "we can plan, but no commitments!".  

Overall we are doing quite fine. Bumps here and there but that happens to everyone! 

There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.  
W. Clement Stone

TTFN